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You would think of having a terrible month, you would get a better month next time, guess not even that is right? well its not terrible just bad. Im not doing a full uni course this year, I failed a unit two years in a row and cannot continue my HND, massive fail =(. Therefore, Im on a UCDP course which is 9 hors a week to get a qualification with the units Ive already done. This means more free time which I really dont need, I would love to have a full time job to fill it up.

Anyway, spending alot of time out of the house which is quite good and meeting all the new faces from uni this year is always good. Most of my time this year has been because of LARP, there are THREEof them, plus all the random rpg stuffs I do. There TTT (teesside treasure trap), UVLARP (uni vampire) and CiD (cities in darkness, another VLARP but with the newer system), lots of effort needs to be put into the characters because I havent started it.

What else? My birthday was Okay, no family (except my bro) to spoil it =) and had a nice evening, plus had the awesome CFC (chocolate fudge cake) from The Southfield....I need more.

Immquite annoyed I wont be going to the MCM expo or Roppongi street aswell, seems I have to go for second best, and thats going to harrogate to go to BOTB with rob, sorry to put you seconds but my reasons for going to london for myself is quite desperate though ill doubt you will fully understand.

Also, alton towers is possibly this thursday, should be a good day if theres no rain.....

Well thanks for reading, things should pick up for novembr it seems as Rob is definatly getting things sorted with DR'bs. See you all soon =)

Current Location: Room, as usual.
Current Mood: tired tired

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I for one think the internet is a wonderful thing! Its shame so many think its a place to shit on, make money and make others lives a misery. There have been many many times ive been ripped off now im thinking of giving this entire online revolution thing a kick in the nads and just leave it behind, thoughs thats going to be extremely tough, considering my responsibilties on it which is most specifically my uni course.

These are a few of the things ive experienced on the web which other shouldent:
Virus's!!!!! Yes everyone gets them, a nuicence, especially when you need to format your system TWICE to make sure its gone!
Moving paypal dates and incorrect online banking, here have a £30 charge for your £2 overdrawn
Legitimate sites with semi decent members ripping you off over £200 with goods which are too good to be true! PS, DONT USE MONEY TRANSFER!!
Internet orders that come a bit short then the company ridiculeing you that you have one TOO MANY of there products!
Custom Made hardware that took around 9 months to just DELIVER!
My first Everquest account going bye byes! (that was AGES ago!)
My eBay accound getting hacked, good thing not much happened there!
Potential Gay friends on the Internet that disappear, forget me or just want me to do certain things for them, my confidence goes down alot.
MY PAYPAL ACCOUND GOT HACKED..........and *they* (more that one person) manages to take £418.11 out of bank accound with available fund of COMPLETELY nothing!!
Actually I LIED! It had......and I HATE HATE HATE myself to be saying this....£30........yes £30...........£30 that SOMEONE ELSE PUT IN.
I dont like it when they steal my money, I couldent care less if they stole for the bank (they have lawyers!), but when they STEAL MY BOYFRIENDS CASH, I get seriously ANGRY!
Now I have no idea if im going to be able to make it down on Thursday, I hope I can get the money some other way (aka Mum).
Its not all bad, I WILL get all the money back into my account, so paypal says, but this inability to use my account and get the money Rob give me is what really making me anxious and upset.

As you can see, for a guy who dosent go out drinking and spends all days playing RPG's and video games, Im having an AWFUL time with financial responsibilities, and I dont want to keep it going like this, perhaps my mum is right, ill have to give her all my student payments and make her manage this, because I cant and Im losing my self confidence all over again, one thing Im having a serously hard time trying to gain over all these years.

Its a good thing this is happening now, if it happened when I was in uni, it would of been worse. I was looking at pictures of rob on his facebook account, I cannot believe at this stage of my life, my lovelife is the ONLY thing thats stable (that and RPG Soc), Im so lucky to have him because it goes to show that after everyone ive met, hes the only person to actually tell me how much of a person I really am. As long as I have you rob, ill try my hardest, regardless of these seemly agonising odds are against me.

As usual, theres a purpose to my rant, so being this long should be understandable. If I wanted to go on, theres so much more, my continueing financial problems (aka NO JOB), nothing to do but to play WOW (even I find it very sad), constant ignores from certain friends and family, Dental problems, sleeping pattern problems, the list goes on and on, Im also curious as to how many will actually read this blog and reply to it......if you do, say "AYE"!

Current Location: Home, in the cold!
Current Mood: lost

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Summer brings alot of opportunities, sadly they have all been and gone, now its going though the low note of a rather differant summer. I have to spend an uncertain month with my two best mates, Nick Ferguson and Robert Bland, two sensational guys that have really made the last year so very special, therefore being rock bottom means Im back with my usual friends. Dont get me wrong, I love all my friends but it seems everyone is popular these days and everyone have new friends to hang around with. I have a few new friends but I dont think we have really connected....if you believe your one of them, dont be hesitant to TALK TO ME, we will both appreciate it.

So back to what to do for a month, because by that time Uni will be on its way back and then happening will start to happen. Searching for a job has become fruitless and not much to do regarding uni, I just dont want to use this month just to play wow or some other video game which at the moment seems to be the only answer.

So, suggestions of what to do with my time is highly reccomended, if you wanna give me some input, Ill be more then happy to help you guys with whatever you want! well aslong as Rob is okay with it =)

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Current Mood: contemplative contemplative

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Yeah, thats how long it takes me to realise I still have a Livejournal and theres thousand of things I can update anyone that still comes here but it would take forever. Im thinking of using this a bit more now due to the fact Internet 2.0 is in full swing again.

Well, this uni is almost over and this time, It MUST be passed and Im confindent that it will be. Im now treasurer of the RPG soc, I have a boyfriend, I have more friends, I have tasks to do to get things organised for the new year (this mainly includes LARP stuff, it should be going ahead ASAP in october!), I have won lots of goodies from WoW Tourneys, I have watched tonnes of anime, I have more and more DS games with lots of pokemon playing and other things which escape my mind.

Things are dying down because of the uni year, but there are still many in boro that want to do stuff, YEY, Im always game!

I should get around to updating my profile aswell, its been a year, things have changes, lots of melon was ate.

Current Location: 'ome
Current Mood: giggly giggly

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Ok, here im going to post whats good at the moment and whats bad:


- Parents away for 3 weeks, leaves me with walking the dog and stuff, but Ive got some freedom and the chance to have partys..........notice the word "chance"
- Found some hidden albums, even MORE music to listen too, also got my hands on Super Eurobeat 176 and 177, good stuff.
- Watched Final Fantasy 7: Last order finally, bu was disaapointed to find its just a retelling of parts of FF7's storyline, though it was really well done.

BAD =( (Now this is where the list gets really heafty)

- I maybe a victim of an horrendous fraud : http://forums.shiningforcecentral.com/index.php?showtopic=9984&st=25&#entry277197
Just goes to show that doset matter how friendly or reliable a forum can be, there will always be the one who brings you down......from the looks of it, I may not be ale to get any of the money back, but im getting some help from the peeps there, and quite likely, citizens advice.
- My Pop'n Music Arcade Style Controller from Desktop Arcade .com STILL hasent arrived, I ordered the thing on the 5th of November last year, yep thats over 6 months, if anyone remembers my old Mp3, that took 6 months also for a refund to be successful. Im going to inquire one more time, and if it isnt here soon, im going to ask for a refund.
- This Laptop has a virus....AGAIN.....why dosent my anti virus ever pick these damn things up....?!?! going to need to format...AGAIN.
- Although Im catching up quick with my programming, Im very unsure that Ill be able to get my asaignment done on time concidering im not grasping some fundamental properties of C, but ill keep on trying, ive got till july, it maybe more then a month, but im unsure if thats long enough to learn what I need to do and finish the assaignment.
- Then, theres three assaignment that need to be done by the end of this month, the grim part though, Ive hardly started any of them, the seem tedious, yet I need to find time to do them, I would do them as quick as possible, but after the last two assaignments needing resubmissions, I have to be careful.
- I have to deliver newspapers on wednesday, thanks to parents being away, I dont mind doing them, I just need to time to do Uni work.
- I need to get a job, too much spending, pressure from parents about rent, free time during summer.........and how im usually always unsuccessful in these things, its something im definatly not in the mood in trying to achieve.
- Im missing some Dark eldar minatures I bought, this happened exactly the same with a wood elf command party I bought a while ago, I HATE this house as to why things just dissappear.
- Utterly depressed by the fact that no one gives a shit about me, what im wanting to be doing or supporting me, but thats to be expected, I havent been completly sociable or empathetic the last few months, but its seems im getting a bit more ignored then I should be.

Im sorry for the pessimissity of this post, but Im having good reason to and from what it looks like, its just getting started. Ive been taking ginseng recently as natural mood lifters but will they be enough to keep me from displaying a bad attitude, although, like usual, just hanging around people normally gives me a little lift aswell, I just dont like it to rub off on others.

Well I hope you have a nice day, because i know its going to be a while before I, myself, are going to have one.

Current Location: Off to Bed
Current Mood: pessimistic pessimistic
Current Music: Silence, again.

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Its inevitable, but I just think when it comes down to me, Im just a cash cow people just want my moolah and thats it. I have NO IDEA how much my brother owes me now, I buy him beer/food/warcraft and I dont get much back, hes needs a job soon or less I think im never going to get any of it back.

I have to do more uni work, therefore I actually need to BE THERE to actually get some motivation and do it.

Its been two weeks and I still havent made time to play the new PIU machines, whats wrong with me, Ive been complaining time after time thats there no PIU up here in north england, one comes and I dont go, its these annoying sleeping patterns, they hate me now.

Got myself a New Archos player, though splashing out all that cash for my own greedy self just makes me wonder if it would be better to give it to my parents who I actually owe money to, but again its that creul cycle that even if I do it, Ill still get it in the face later and they would never noticed I did anything to benefit them.

Oh yeah, need to get job applications sent off, I want more money and use this free time for something productive.


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Current Location: Laptop, Bed, Usual
Current Mood: grumpy grumpy

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Spyware, virus's and Anti-Virus's, things that would make even the sound coming from your laptop speaker make the high pitched voice of Lolitia sound like an evil demon from hell, Ive decided to format my laptop for the first time since getting it......then the question come up again, how long do OS's live for? Years? a few months? it all depends how long you spend on the web and what shyte you DL from there, and from the looks of it, there was alot of that. Well that made my weekend consist of organising files and folders so there all good again.

Therefore, Just because I went and answered these questions from a friend's livejournal, Ill repost them here, reply with answer if you like, your not obliged to answer them, I was just bored with the formatting.

1. Can you cook?
2. What was your dream growing up?
3. What talent do you wish you had?
4. Favorite place?
5. Favorite actor?
6. What was the last book you read more than once?
7. What zodiac sign are you?
8. Any Tattoos and/or Piercings?
9. Worst Habit?
10. Favorite snack?
11. What is your favorite sport?
12. Do you have a Negative or Optimistic attitude?
13. What would you do if you were stuck in an elevator with me?
14. Best thing to ever happen to you?
15. Tell me one weird fact about you.
16. Do you have any pets?
17. Do you know how to do the Macarena?
18. What time is it where you are now?
19. Do you think clowns are cute or scary?
20. If you could change one thing about how you look, what would it be?
21. Would you be my partner in crime or my conscience?
22. What color eyes do you have?
23. Ever been arrested?
24. Bottle or Draft?
25. If you won $10,000 dollars today, what would you do with it?
26. What kind of bubble gum do you prefer to chew?
27. What's your favorite bar to hang at?
28. Do you believe in ghosts?
29. Favorite thing to do in your spare time?
30. Do you swear a lot?
31. Biggest pet peeve?
32. In one word, how would you describe yourself?
33. In one word, how would you describe me?
34. Will you repost this so I can fill it out and do the same for you?

Its 5:17 AM now and theres no point in sleeping as I have a lesson at 9:00am, I woke up at 5:30PM yesturday so Im still in that akward sleeping pattern. I dont know if ill ever get out of it.......I think I need a job....

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Current Location: Downstairs PC
Current Mood: gloomy gloomy
Current Music: ........Silence..........

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Yesturday was valatines days and what did I do.....slept for around 17 hours.....

Yes thats how bad my sleeping pattern currently is, went to bed at at 4AM and woke up around 9PM..........

Anyway, so Valentines day was a very short day and totally missed RPG soc.

Therefore, Im just going to stay awake till my 9AM lesson and have a shower before hand, I shouldent be tired by then, I hope.

WIth nothing much to do, Just played warcraft to get my Paladin to 43, still a little bit to go, Im going to update Myspace a little also. I know I havent been on MSN much....too much warcraft.....=)

Also, because of the tournament proposal, practiced quite a few para routines.....still no word what is happening to that one though.

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Current Location: The Usual....
Current Mood: surprised surprised
Current Music: King & Queen - King & Queen (Friday Night Version)

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Its been a very busy week and this has definatly been the biggest "WTF?" moment I have had in a long while. On Monday I recieved this email from Youtube.com:

Click here!

I dont understand there reasoning behind this.

1. The full video itself is still available on youtube, why hasent that gone, being better quality, I could see it to be the first to go.

2. My video is a tatsujin and very bad quality one at that, there are other on youtube that look just the same as mine.

3. My other tatsujins are intact, there just the same as this vid except there not DoLL.

Im still scratching my head over this and it increase the confusion of my already love and hate relationship with one of the most influencial video game companies ive been supporting. Im thinking of writing a short essay of my experiances with konami as I have been playing their games for over 20 years.

Well, the busy part of ICA handing in is over, thats 4 lessons successfully done, all I gotta do now is practice programming more and more, I dont want to fall behind....

Theres quite a few words on forums about the national DDR tournament on the supernova in london around aprilish, lots of people have expressed interest so it would be good to see everyone again after I missed last years expo (and soon to be the midlands expo aswell). Als, Para Para Tourney in Febuary? What on earth, its extremely short notice and will it recieve a good turn out? Im curious to see what the rules are going to be like because Im not entering if we are using the scores from the game as the sensors aint 100%, Ill express that in the post.

I purchased the cillit bang CD single on tuesday....go Jakazid =)

Also purchased and external 5.1 sound card for my laptop so I finally have surround sound for it, Machinae Supremacy never sounded so good =)

Beta Test on www.kyle-ward.com Im very intriged, went from 33% yesturday to 35% today, I keeping an eye on it and see whats going to happen, it could be very well be the next gen dance game.......

Now that thelast few days are over, I can start to pick up on WoW again, With BC, I created a blood elf Paladin, like usual, it get reported that everyone wants to play but it turn out there isnt as much as you think and the most unlikely people, for which I am included, actually decide to make one. They are an interesting class, even thier class trees are extremly varied within each branch.

Thank you for reading and feel free to post comments.

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Current Location: Laptop @ Home
Current Mood: okay okay
Current Music: Super Striker - Go 2

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With my ever expanding growth of web building knowledge, I thought it was worth my time to put it to good use. Today I spent almost 12 hours on updating my website and then, doing a brand new website for a large world of warcraft guild, which me and my brother are currently part of. I must say Im quite pround of what ive done, its not a fantastic site, and the content is a little scarce, but its coming along very nicely.

If you wanna check them out, http://wisandcig.9999mb.com is the address and http://www.geocities.com/justicanuk/

And to think, There still lots to do this weekend, definatly need to do some uni work this weekend, just to keep up to date, things are really picking up pace and I dont want to fall behind.

Its strange with all these things going on, im not to stressed, maybe that my hard work is going into something creative has stopped the stress to increase, I dunno, Ill just keep at it .

Current Location: In front of a fire......
Current Mood: pleased pleased
Current Music: Warcraft is in the Background!

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